"Kitchen Disasters" or "There's No Use Crying Over Split Cake"

I pride myself on being an honest person. If you want to hear the truth no matter how awful you can always trust that I'll tell it to you. So, in demonstration of my shining honesty, I show you this. 

Remember when I said I was waiting for the other shoe to drop with all this experimentation success?  Well here we are.

I won't bother telling you what it was supposed to be (in case I later find a way to fix it). Honestly I think was too busy jammin to Maroon 5 to really give this cake the attention it deserved but then again I've always had trouble with cakes for some reason ( lack of patience I think).

The funny thing is yesterday I finally had pictures/recipes that were good enough to be accepted by Tastespotting ( I was totally jazzed!Dancing even) but now a day later not only did I make a cake that looks like it weathered an earthquake but I took terrible pictures of it too (all gross and grainy).

Yuck!

I even tried in vain to whip up a second version that turned out so terrible I spat it into the trash. I'm not too disheartened though, it's kind of funny even. Because really, have you ever seen a more pathetic looking cake in your life? It reminds me of the birthday cake Haggrid brought Harry only a furry giant didn't sit on it.

I've even mildly considered leaving the house so I could come back, "discover it" and accuse my boyfriend of smashing the cake while I was gone. "What have you DONE?!?" Should I go for it? I mean it's one way to kill an afternoon...

What? You've got to laugh to keep from crying.

What is your most awful kitchen disaster?